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Category Archives: Fiction
Team Robinson
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Team Robinson T-Shirt
“Robinson Crusoe on Mars” is a 1964 science fiction movie based upon the early 18th-century Daniel Defoe novel, “Robinson Crusoe”. I’ve always liked this story. My Dad had water colored an illustrated version of this novel, when he was young and I enjoyed reading it when I was young too. It never bothered me that he hadn’t finished coloring every drawing in the book, because that always seemed to invite more story yet to come and then along came Mars. I remember seeing this movie after it came out. I also remember thinking that it was pretty neat. I watched it again last night, after I discovered that it was now available for streaming on Netflix.
Fifty years of technological advancement has not been kind to this movie. The Mars probe is studded with flashing lights and mechanical dials and switches. The astronaut’s personal data assistant (PDA) is the size of a small suitcase. For some reason, he even carries a handgun. The movie’s special effects are plentiful enough, but also laughably dated. The movie holds true to the original storyline, which helped the movie much back then and saves it from abject ridicule now.
It is impossible to predict the future, especially fifty years of it, so one shouldn’t hold the movie maker’s errors against them. In life there are too many black swans and exogenous shocks to expect one vision of the future to hold up for long. For example, the flashing lights and mechanical dials and switches of yesteryear have been replaced with backlit, touch sensitive glass displays, as seen on the iPhone, my PDA. But how did we get there?
The story is interesting. I heard it on “99% Invisible”, a podcast about design by Roman Mars. The story involves another science fiction show, the reboot, “Star Trek the Next Generation”. TNG didn’t have the budget to create a control room with all of the flashing lights and mechanical dials and switches of the original series, so a cost-effective alternative was used, backlit, touch sensitive glass displays. They didn’t really work, after all it was just a TV show, but it could cheaply be made to look like it was working.
Years later, along came Steve Jobs and Apple. Jobs liked the TNG controls and made them work and then embedded them in the iPhone. The rest as they say is history. Speaking of which, I’ll close this meandering post with Daniel Defoe’s original title for “Robinson Crusoe”, it’s a long one:
“The Life and Strange Surprising Adventures of Robinson Crusoe, Of York, Mariner: Who lived Eight and Twenty Years, all alone in an un-inhabited Island on the Coast of America, near the Mouth of the Great River of Oroonoque; having been cast on Shore by Shipwreck, wherein all the Men perished but himself. With An Account how he was at last as strangely delivered by Pirates.”
Data’s Uniform
Data’s Uniform
Work, work, work, that’s what I’ve been doing. In-between spin cycles and Mister Hanky’s escapades, there are many hurry up and wait periods. During these down periods odd conversations can blossom. Jack Bauer once asked, “Which space ship would you want to be on?” This is indicative of the spacy and geeky conversation that range rats have. As near as I could tell, Mister Bauer wanted to be on them all, Enterprise, Serenity, you name it. While this conversation had the air of make-believe, it also revealed true dreams and aspirations. He asked me, “Would you join Star Fleet?” and was surprised when I said no. Bauer is young and I am old. Star Fleet’s mission to explore brave new worlds must be for the young.
Winter: Flight or Fight?
Trumpeter Swans and Seagulls
This winter, a record number of trumpeter swans have descended upon the Saint Louis area’s Riverlands Migratory Bird Sanctuary. Located along the Mississippi River, 900 of them were counted at the peak of this season. Trumpeter swans are all white, with black beaks, legs, and feet. These swans are named for their resonant, trumpet-like call. They’re the largest waterfowl in North America, weighing about 25 pounds and have a wingspan more than seven feet. At the start of the 20th century, they were thought to be nearly extinct. There were still some in Alaska, but in the lower 48 states, only 69 trumpeter swans were left, clustered in the Rockies. Along the Mississippi flyway, the swans had disappeared. Conservation efforts began in the 1980s and by 1991 five birds were spotted at the Riverlands. The next year a few more swans were seen. Last year there were 500 birds and now 900. That is one heck of a success story.
Kindergarten is like the ocean. You don’t want to turn your back on it.
This week has been a particularly cold and blustery one. Anne had no school on either Monday or Tuesday, because of the weather. Wednesday’s 4th grade left her flat on her back. I had to wake her for dinner and then there was Thursday’s kindergarten. She texted me at noon, “Help, I feel like Arnold.” referring to Schwarzenegger’s Kindergarten Cop stint. Several kids wet themselves and none of them listened to her. It is so cold here that I’m not surprised that these kids have gone crazy and by proxy Anne too. Bracketing quotes are from the movie and bear no resemblance to Anne’s teaching style. I think. 😉
SHUUUUUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
My week was also tough. I spent all week running around like a chicken with its head cut off. I’m planning a trip. So, I’m getting stuff built, lots of stuff. I’m meeting more new people every day. It’s sort of exciting, but it is also pretty tiring. I’m averaging 10,000+ steps at work everyday. I try to get in earlier than normal, because all these new friends work the union’s schedule. This new work schedule causes even more sleep deprivation, but I am motivated. This arctic winter weather is a powerful motivator to get out-of-town. If I pull this off, I’ll work for two weeks in relatively balmy Seattle. Anne’s spring break tacks on nicely after this window. Jay and Carl are welcoming. If I can pull this trip off, I can tell that stupid groundhog to take a hike. I’m choosing flight over fight.
Roll to Save
Knights of the Dinner Table
Dungeon Master: The corridor ends at a closed wooden door.
Thief: I approach the door quietly, all the while searching for traps.
DM: [The sound of dice rolling.] You don’t detect any traps.
Thief: I listen at the door for any sounds?
DM: High pitched voices utter an ugly guttural tongue, goblins.
Thief: I alert the party and then quietly try to open the door.
DM: The door is locked.
Thief: I attempt to pick the lock.
DM: [More dice rolling is heard.] The lock springs open with an audible click and the voices inside fall silent.
Thief: I throw open the door, draw my dagger and then tumble into the room.
Warrior: I draw my broadsword, raise my shield and rush in after the thief.
Elf Ranger: I notch an arrow and draw my bow.
Wizard: I prepare to cast the spell, Magic Missile.
DM: Inside the room you all see several goblins seated around a large wooden table. It looks like you’ve interrupted them, while they were playing some sort of dice game. Also scattered across the table are pieces of paper and the occasional miniature figure. They all seemed surprised, but I still want everyone to roll for initiative. [The sound of dice rolling ensues.]
Anyone who has ever played Dungeons and Dragons will recognize the previous excerpted dialog as an example of play from that game. Millions of people have played the game. This month, D&D turns forty. One of the most defining games of my life, this game is now officially middle-aged. I was there at the first, in 1974. Well really the summer of ’75, but I did thumb the rules of Chainmail, one of the ancestors of D&D, even earlier than all of that. I think that after forty years, this all qualifies me as an early adopter.
When I lived in Ann Arbor, I role-played with my war-gaming buddies, but when I moved to Saint Louis similar buddies were hard to find. So, I decided to breed my dungeon crawling party. This worked out quite well. Dan and Dave still dabble with the game and will likely purchase D&D 5th edition, when it comes out this summer. Their paired initials even match those of the game!
I’m not an active player now, but this summer’s reboot does offer an opportunity to revisit it. Mainly now, because the game has been a part of my life for so long, aspects of it have crossed over into everyday life. For example, the mound of clothes that semi-permanently sits on our bedroom, waiting to be folded, is known as the Shambling Mound, a classic D&D monster. Another creature that sometimes appears, also due to poor housekeeping habits, is the Gelatinous Cube, usually found at the back of our frig. Need I say more?
I’ve gotten my geek on here, but Dungeons and Dragons has influenced more than just me. It has spawned a billion dollar video game industry. It has also created a cottage industry in D&D parodies. TV shows like the Big Bang Theory and Community have dipped into this well, but the most fan-tastic of these tributes reside on YouTube. This video is one of the more loving. Besides SJ Tucker, the other cast members are The Gamers, who do many D&D parodies.
The History of Future Folk
“The History of Future Folk” is a goofy, low-budget film that embraces both its goofiness and its lack of special effects. It has a 96 on the Tomato-meter and is available now on Netflix. This picture tells the exaggerated origin story of the real-life bluegrass band, Future Folk that has been enthralling audiences of the NYC nightclub scene for a decade. It has great folk music, humor and charm.
The above clip shows two guys in snazzy red spacesuits with bucket helmets. These characters are Kevin and General Trius, also-know-as Bill, at least to his wife. They are space aliens from the planet Hondo. Trius was sent here a decade ago to wipeout the human race. You see the planet Hondo is about to be wiped-out by a gigantic comet and the people of Hondo need someplace else to live, so why not Earth? He was about to do the deed, when he heard music for the first time. They don’t have music on Hondo. They also don’t have buckets, which explains the helmets. Later, Kevin came to earth to assassinate Bill, but also fell under the sway of Earth music. Can both Earth and Hondo be saved? Will Bill and his wife makeup? What about Kevin and that police officer? The trailer poses these questions better than I, watch it and then watch the movie. Hondo!