Make Winter Great Again

Paul Ryan's Live Stream from the Capitol

Paul Ryan’s Live Stream from the Capitol

This year’s storm of the century is now pounding the East Coast, while we in flyover-land are left here to just watch. So much snow, so much ice, so much narcissism and none of it mine. Our 4” that I was crowing about earlier this week turned out to be only two. Still, they closed the schools and Anne got the day off and I took it off too. I never did make it to Art Hill though. Winter storm Jonas, as the Weather Channel calls this blizzard does appear to be some storm. Very likely earning the appellation, the blizzard of 2016, but such a name is way too prosaic for such a storm in this hashtag era and we can’t just recycle the hashtag names from previous year’s storms of the century, like #Snowzilla, #Snowtastrophe or #Snowmageddon. That simply would not do. Slate had a poll for naming this blizzard and I liked some of their suggestions: #Snoverit, #SnowballWarming, #Snowden and #DavidSnowie, but my personal favorite was #MakeWinterGreatAgain. I wonder how they will manage to blame this storm on Obama. Speaker Ryan has a webcam setup on the front of the Capitol to record and broadcast this event. By the time that I found it, it looked like a polar bear in a snowstorm. It has an interesting soundtrack though. It is a funky, instrumental synth jam that may be Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing”. I wonder how many babies will be born nine-months from now? I wonder how many of those babies will be conceived while Paul Ryan’s live stream is playing in the background? I’m just asking.

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