Campaign for North Africa

Back in the day, when I was young, my nerdy high school friends and I would while away many a late-night playing boardgames. These were not your run-of-the-mill games, but rather monster games. Their boards were so big that a ping pong table was required for setup. Hundreds, if not thousands of ½” square playing pieces were involved. Rule books and tables ran dozens of pages. Play of a single game would run the summer. We never finished a game. They would usually peter out, before a new one took its place. Campaigns covered by these monsters include Normandy, Operation Market-Garden and the Battle of the Bulge. While all of these monster games were huge there was one that was in a class by itself, Campaign for North Africa. It was so big that we never ever attempted to play it.

According to the New York Times, two blokes from England are planning to play all 111 turns of this game. They are documenting their play with a website and a podcast, War with a Mate. They estimate that it will take them twenty years to finish their game.

With a game this far from the norm there has to be some odd rules. There are also some rules that are simply puzzling. Aircraft are allowed to transport dead camels but not living camels. Yet nowhere in the rules does it explain where you might come across a living or dead camel. The German general Erwin Rommel has his own game piece, and the rules mention that his truck has access to only AM radio. This seems to have no bearing on play. The one rule that we have always enjoyed ridiculing though is the Italian Pasta Rule:

One of the biggest mistakes the Italians made during the entire Desert Campaign was to provide their troops with a diet which was composed, in large part, of spaghetti and macaroni. Aside from providing insufficient protein (this wasn’t Buitoni Brand), pasta has one serious drawback in -the desert: you need water to cook it! Therefore, each Italian battalion, when it receives its Stores, must receive an additional 1 Point of Water when Stores are distributed. Any battalion-sized unit that does not receive their Pasta Point (one Water point) may not voluntarily exceed their CPA that Turn. Furthermore, Italian battalions not receiving their Pasta Point that have a Cohesion Level of -10 or worse immediately become Disorganized, as if they had reached -26. As soon as such units get their Pasta Point, they regain the original Cohesion Level (i.e., the level they had before they disintegrated).

This trip down memory lane, recounting my misspent youth is not totally in vain. As it turns out I own a copy of Campaign for North Africa. As the Times article relates, my copy could be worth $1000 now. When published in 1979, it retailed for $44. Pretty good investment.

Wordle in 4

Photo by Nils Huenerfuerst on Unsplash

This week saw the demise of the Washington Post. Democracy died not in darkness, but in yesterday’s morning light, when a sizable portion of the paper’s staff was laid off. I promptly again re-cancelled my subscription. My on again, off again, love, hate relationship with this paper has been on the rocks ever since its owner, Jeff Bezos, turned traitor and trump suck up last year. I had canceled the paper before but was lured back again when it appeared that my worst fears might not be realized. I was wrong and will not be back again.

The Post had long been on the rocks. Its 2013 sale to Bezos was only the first indicator of this difficulty. Back in 2016, when Trump was first elected, I rushed to subscribe to both the Washington Post and the New York Times. It was my way of showing solidarity with the resistance. Both papers enjoyed a renaissance then, but the Post’s comeback was squandered. Not so the Times. It was able to diversify into of all things, games. Who knew that five letters are all that it took.

It just had to be the right five letters. This week, the New Yorker had a funny Wordle themed piece, Murder Most Wordle. That and Anne’s announcement this morning that she had gotten Wordle in four was all it took for the genesis of this post. This got me thinking, what is the most perfect Wordle score? Certainly not one that is just dumb luck. Likewise, two is simply luck adjacent. Conversely, six implies luck of a different kind. Like you were finally able to guess which was the right five-letter word that matched the four letters you already had. As with two so it is with five. Signifying slightly more luck than otherwise. That just leaves three and four. With three there is still the air of privilege hanging about it. You were a little bit lucky with your first guess, plus a guiding angel helped steer you quickly to the correct answer. Still, it was mainly on you, and you should be proud of your score. But with four, you have proven yourself on your own. With a little bit of luck, luck is always a part of this game, intelligence and some patience, you were able to able to pilot your game safely for the win.

In our after-game discussion Anne shared with me her Wordle wins distribution. With almost fourteen hundred wins, she is currently batting 97%. A lot more impressive than I would be, if I ever played. I still use the Times for news and cooking. Don’t forget about cooking. I am currently trying to ripen some persimmons for Saturday’s potluck. Anyway, Anne is a solid four, by far and away. That is what I love about her. She is both patient and smart and I am very lucky that she loves me too. At least that is my best fourth guess. 

Progeny Report


The boyz have been busy. Dan and Britt, along with Britt’s sister are in England. Above are photos of them at Wally World Warhammer World in Nottingham. Dan is seen petting a UN colored M113 like tank, while Britt is being accosted by a space marine. This version of National Lampoon’s European Vacation is brought to you by Dan, naturally, exercising his one-day choice of activities.

Kamado Joe’s Little Joe

Meanwhile back around the old home fires, Dave has been trying out his new smoker that he got last month for his birthday. I hope that he learns fast how to use it. So that when we return, we can enjoy some of that ole Massachusetts style BBQ. I look forward to having some of his fine grilling when we visit.

Roll to Save

Photo by Timothy Dykes on Unsplash

I love the roleplaying game, Dungeons & Dragons and have always poo-pooed naysayer’s accusations that this game sponsors satanism and devil worship. I was surprised to learn recently that its greatest sin is not of the occult, but plain old garden variety racism. Elon Musk that paragon of virtue has complained about the recent direction for this game, attempting to redress these past sins.

D&D is fifty years old this year. Originally created by Gary Gygax, it has always had musty smell of nerdy teenage boys hanging about it. In its half-century of existence various other owners have steered its development, always close to the edge of the cliff of insolvency. Hasbro owns the game now, which is enjoying a post-Covid renaissance. It turns out that a popular answer to the isolation of lockdowns were D&D Zoom meetings. To broaden interest in this game beyond its original white demographic, Hasbro plans to make the game more inclusive.

Cue our self-appointed anti-woke champion. Hearing of Hasbro’s plans, Musk first objected and then threatened to buyout the company and do to it, what he did to Twitter. An article in the Atlantic details this story. How this all plays out is anyone’s guess. Musk has the means, motive and track record to ruin it all.