It is hot here in Saint Louis, no big surprise, after all it is July. It is hot in Atlanta, which is even less surprising. But for our northern tier of states to be feeling the heat, that is a bit unusual. Word was from the planet Ann Arbor that the 5th was a scorcher. Even Rochester is feeling some excess warmth. Now if those New Yorkers could only bank this heat until January, they would be sitting pretty. We here at RegenAxe (especially the later half) feel your pain, but I’m afraid folks we are going to have to ask you all to dig a little deeper and turn up the heat and feel the burn.
Why you ask? I’ll give you two reasons, even if they are both related. It has been scientifically proven that there is a direct link between the misery index in Saint Louis and favorable weather at the Cabin (located on the shores of Lake Superior). I have extensive anecdotal evidence to support this assertion, so you can take it as the God’s scientific truth, whatever that means.
Anyway, way too much background, let’s move on. Let’s formulate this thesis:
Hot and humid in Saint Louis = beach day at the Cabin (1)
A corollary to this thesis if formulated as such:
Too hot and humid in Saint Louis = an excellent beach day at the Cabin (2)
Since the left half of equation 1 is almost a given, then so is the right half, right? Well no, someone has been monkeying with the weather. Be it global warming, climate change or just Al Gore, last summer’s weather wasn’t normal. Saint Louis had one of its coldest Augusts on record. Our electric bill was only $40. The downside of this largest in Saint Louis was that those poor cabin folk froze last August.
To redress last summer’s thermal imbalance the National Weather Association has issued the following proclamation:
Since Saint Louis shirked its responsibility last year of maintaining uncomfortable daytime highs, the rest of the eastern United States is expected to pick up the slack. To this end eastern seaboard highs are expected to rise. So are all northern tier states and providences south of the 45th parallel.
As a Saint Louisan for thirty years, I apologize to the country; we did not pull up our fair share of the last summer’s slack. This summer we can all do better. Let’s all of us turn off our air conditioners and turn on our heaters and provide the warmth that our northern neighbors crave.
The four little photos were iPhoned in on Anne’s journey north. The Purple Cone Flower picture is for Banana. It is not an iPhone picture. OK, enough snarkyness for one night. I’ll try to do better tomorrow.