Slow Jammin’ the Day Away

We had plans to bicycle in Illinois today, but weather interfered. So, we ended up planning some penitential cleaning instead. Before we started though, as part of the process of girding our loins to do battle, we web surfed the morning away. One gem that was found was President Barack Obama’s address at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. This annual event, also dubbed the ‘Nerd Prom’, has a history of roasting Washington insiders. It is an event where politician rub shoulders with celebrities. Last night’s dinner was attended by the likes of Rick Santorum, Lindsay Lohan, Newt Gingrich and Kim Kardashian, to name a few. Maybe address is not the right word, how about stand-up routine? Whatever you call it, Obama kills, IMHO. Fox News of course, had a different spin, “Obama mocks scandals and Republicans”, but I don’t think that that was exactly a fair and balanced assessment.

  • Now, some have said I blame too many problems on my predecessor, but let’s not forget that’s a practice that was initiated by George W. Bush.
  • Four years ago, I was locked in a brutal primary battle with Hillary Clinton. Four years later, she won’t stop drunk-texting me from Cartagena.
  • I’d be remiss if I didn’t congratulate the Huffington Post on their Pulitzer Prize. […] There’s no one else out there linking to the kinds of hard-hitting journalism that HuffPo is linking to every single day.
  • What’s the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? A pit bull is delicious. A little soy sauce.
  • [On Romney] We also both have degrees from Harvard; I have one, he has two. What a snob.
  • And just to set the record straight, I really do enjoy attending these dinners. In fact, I had a lot more material prepared, but I have to get the Secret Service home in time for their new curfew.

I’ve included some of my favorite jokes and one-liners and above, a link to the entire speech. I wonder, will this entitle me to next year’s Pulitzer? It is long, but worth watching. A lot of the jokes are visual and hardly a political troupe goes unsung. Come November though, who will have the last laugh?

It never did rain. Chalk today up as a rest day. I cleaned, while Anne flung. I get in trouble, if we reverse these roles. Inspecting last night’s hail damage, Anne found a baker’s dozen dimples on the Prius. Oh well, they add character. Our friend John, suffered worse. His car windows were broken and on his house, “Half of my solar panels got kerplunked.” Downtown, a beer tent collapsed, killing one and injuring 100. It was a dark and stormy night.

I’m not so good at other things, but I do maintain my Litespeed to within a gnat’s ass of perfection. However, I have not replaced any of its decals. They and the titanium frame are all that’s left of the original equipment. Not even the badge is original. It fell off and a new one was sent at an email’s request. I could get new decals for free too, but these worn ones have character. Some Litespeed owners strip their decals. Either they don’t appreciate the unsightliness of a worn decal, or they hope removing the brand makes their bikes less theft worthy.

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